Twitter can be a confusing place for writers, and the internet is awash with conflicting opinions on how you should use it.
Let’s cut through some of that noise, and get to the simple underlying principles.
Being a good Twitter citizen (Twitizen?) boils down to two golden rules.
I’ve written before about the value of Twitter for writers and how to get started on Twitter in just an hour per week. But it’s also important to remember that using Twitter poorly can do more harm than good.
These two “rules” will help you make the most of your Twitter presence, and avoid the pitfalls, without getting yourself tied in knots!
First, let’s see what they’re based upon…
Twitter for Writers: Make friends, not sales
(Image via Bigstock)
How Twitter works for writers
Are you:
- a reality television star?
- a famous actor?
- an author with repeat appearances on the New York Times bestseller list?
- the president of a country?
If you answered YES to any or all of the above, then you will probably be using Twitter to connect with your fans.
For the rest of us, especially those who are emerging authors, or hopefuls who are simply trying to build a “platform” for their work, Twitter is NOT about having fans.
I’ll say that again, because it goes against the usual assumptions, and it’s so important.
For most writers, Twitter is NOT about having fans.
“Huh?” I hear you say. “So what is it about?”
For writers, Twitter is about MAKING CONNECTIONS.
I meet a lot of people who don’t understand how you can make meaningful connections in 140 characters. I sympathise with their confusion, because I didn’t understand it either until I did it!
This is how it works (let’s call it the “stages of Twitter intimacy”… it makes it sound like a psychology paper!)
- Interact with people on Twitter.
- You start noticing that you like the way someone operates and the things they talk about, so you take a look at their blog.
- You interact on their blog by leaving comments, and they probably respond by coming to your blog and leaving comments.
- After many months of this, perhaps a situation arises where you are able to help each other in a specific way, so you move the connection to email or Skype.
Get married(just kidding 😉 )
Some Twitter friendships are “functional” — you appreciate each other for the skills you can offer each other.
Others become good old-fashioned friendships, because you stumble across people whose company you enjoy. Think of it as the modern equivalent to the penfriend of the past.
You don’t go through all the stages with everyone, obviously. I’m currently connected to 5000+ people on Twitter. I don’t Skype with them all. 😉 But sometimes you just hit it off with a person, who may be in your own city or at the far reaches of the galaxy, and the next thing you know, you are helping one another on your path to writing and publishing.
These are the golden rules for making these connections work.
Golden Rule 1: Make friends, not sales
It’s not an infomercial, it’s a relationship.
There are lots of lists about what to tweet and what not to tweet, and I’ll cover a few below. But the simplest way to navigate all these options is to run it through the Friendship Filter. Ask yourself:
- Would I say this to a friend?
- Would I do this to a friend?
Would I say this to a friend?
Would you go up to a friend, thrust your book in their face and shout: “My book is the best book in the history of the world. Buy it NOW!” ???
Probably not, unless you have a different relationship with your friends than I do with mine. 😉 This doesn’t mean you can’t ever talk about your book, but only do it occasionally, and keep it friendly. This is a great example of book promotion that’s been run through the Friendship Filter:
YIKES! Food of Ghosts is now ranked 8th in ALL Kindle crime books in the US! WOW! A huge thanks to all! amzn.to/ZZsohS
— Marianne Wheelaghan (@MWheelaghan) April 17, 2013
When I saw that tweet, I was excited for Marianne, replied with my congratulations, and was only too happy to retweet it to all my followers. She made it easy for me.
Make it easy for your Twitter followers to support you.
Would I do this to a friend?
If you go to a party…
- Do you take a robot with you to shake hands on your behalf?
- Do you walk around announcing a running total of how many friends you’ve made and lost?
- Do you hand out money, trying to buy as many friends as you can get before the night is over?
- Do you poke a friend in the arm repeatedly and insist that they tell your news to all their friends, and then get belligerent when they don’t comply?
If you do, you are probably regarded as, at best, charmingly eccentric, or more likely, Absolutely Nuts.
I know some people recommend auto-Direct Messaging new followers, and auto-tweeting your follower/unfollower numbers, but they are some of the most complained-about behaviours on Twitter. Some people will even instantly unfollow you for doing this. (I won’t, I’m pretty mellow about Twitter mistakes. I’ve made plenty myself in my time. 😉 )
Some Twitter services advertise that they can get you 5000 followers fast. Don’t buy it. That is a garbage following that will get you nowhere. You’re much better off to have 50 followers who are really interested in interacting with you.
And badgering people to retweet you, or insisting that they must promote your book, just because you have tweeted something of theirs, tends to drive people away. Some people will unfollow you for this. (Again, I won’t, I’m mellow about mistakes.) Respect the right of others to control their own tweet stream and set their own standards.
Golden Rule 2: Be the kind of friend you’d like to have
The best way to build quality connections is to reach out to others in friendship. Look for ways to be the kind of Twitter friend you’d like to have.
- Be involved: Congratulate people who are celebrating achievements, commiserate with people who are having a hard time.
- Be responsive: If someone sends you an @ message or mentions you, reply to them.
- Be useful: Tweet handy things, such as links to great articles you’ve found that will help others do what they need to do.
- Be fun: Some people say you must always stay On Message, but I say the occasional funny cat video doesn’t do any harm. 😉
- Be encouraging: Retweet a tweet, go to someone’s blog and make a comment, tweet other people’s blog posts that you found useful or inspiring, tweet other people’s books if you’ve read them.
- Be chatty: Engage in real conversations, and don’t be always looking for ways to shoehorn your book into the discussion unless it’s really, really, REALLY relevant.
- Be kind: Tolerance for the mistakes of others is a splendid idea, since you’ll make mistakes yourself!
- Be yourself.
Don’t worry if it takes you a few months to get some momentum going on Twitter. That’s OK. Good friendships take longer to form, but they last longer too.
Don’t worry if you make some mistakes along the way. That’s OK too. Most of us will forgive you and give you another chance. That’s what friends are for. 🙂
What have you learned about making friends on Twitter? Share your experiences. Warn us about pitfalls. And tell us, what worked for you?
Belinda –
i’m coming late to your posts, but learning things I need to know. I’m still in
the minor leagues of tweeting, but hope with your tutorials I’ll move up . . . not
necessarily to the Major Leagues, but a better player.
Jack
You’re right on time, Jack. 🙂 Hope it helps you get more value out of Twitter!
Belinda,
Very informative and helpful.
Thank you for the insights.
Glad it’s useful, Jerry. They’re the principles I try to live by on Twitter, and they have been positive for me.
This is a very nice article, Belinda, thanks so much for sharing it.
I’ve read many articles on how you should behave on Twitter. My understanding is that in the end, you should be yourself and act as you act in everyday life. This will require time to build interaction (I don’t have nearly enough the amount of it I’d like yet), but I think it’s the only sensible thing to do.
So, I’ll see you around on Twitter ^_^
I agree that everyone needs to work out how to make their own way on Twitter, and exactly how to “be yourself”. It’s a strange world, but it’s fun and useful too. Enjoy!
Very useful article Belinda. I’m anxious already that I’ve offended someone, not tweeted enough, not replied enough, said too much, following, not following, unfollowing. Phew I’ve got a headache. And all I want to do is find a creative way to be bring voices together and learn about people without being a slave to the social media monster.
I’m even aware that I havemt replied to you because I’ve forgotten what articles I’ve responded to. There must be a formular to managing various platforms without drowning in them and I have faith that I will get it, eventually.
All good stuff.
Jazz
Hi Jazz, don’t worry, you’ll get the hang of it all! And here I am, just noticing that I haven’t replied to your comment for more than a month. 😉 We’ll all get there in the end.
Great tips. It still took work but it was much easier to launch my travel site than to promote my first book Amalfi Blue through Twitter.
Your post should be required reading for the newbie tweeter. If we all followed these guidelines, the Twitterverse would be even more delightful than it already is.
I’m far more mindful now about whom I choose to follow than I was when I first started out, but it took a while to figure out that people with 40,000 followers who have decided to follow me really aren’t remotely interested in me and won’t be offended if I don’t follow back. I’ve learned to avoid like the plague tweeters whose bios scream “I FOLLOW BACK!!! because following them almost always leads to a mass of bot follows. If I accidentally end up following a relentless self-promoter, I’m much quicker to jettison them than I used to be.
In spite of the me-me-me-ers, the DM-ers,and the cutesy picture spammers, I do love my Twitter and am grateful for the many great connections and friendships it has spawned.
Thanks for your comment, Kern. It’s interesting what you’ve noticed about the “I follow back” people and an increase in spam bots. I hadn’t twigged to that connection before so I’ll pay attention now! If they seem a genuine writer-tweeter apart from the followback, I’ll often still follow them because I figure they haven’t realised it’s not a good idea (yet). 🙂 But I do have days where I get a rush of DJs etc following, and I think, “Huh?” (I don’t follow DJs…)
But I definitely read a person’s bio and scroll through their tweet stream every time before I follow. It really doesn’t take that long and I often find out the most fascinating things. The goal is to find interesting people to engage with, not just to build a massive number of followers.
Keep on enjoying Twitter! 🙂
Thanks Belinda. I often return to your site to make sure I am getting the right advice! I appreciate the honesty and clarity of your style, and the recognition that it’s okay to make mistakes. It helps me know that I am very okay! 🙂
Thanks for the kind words, Norah, and I’m really encouraged that you find the posts helpful. That’s my goal!
And yes, go forth and make mistakes with boldness. You are definitely OK. 🙂 There’s that old saying: he who never made a mistake never made anything. Trite but true. We need to give ourselves permission to be a bit average on the way to being brilliant. It releases our creativity and passion!
Occasional cat videos may be fine but people who tweet cutesy pix five times a day make me lose the will to live. Today however I’ve swapped notes on knitting with one tweep and had a four-way conversation with three others about grammar.
Hi Ducky, yes, we need to keep our cute nonsense to bearable levels! I have the odd moment of getting carried away, but generally I try to stay On Topic for most of my tweets, with only a few diversions just for fun.
I’ve had a conversation about knitting too. How socks are the best thing to knit in Florida.
Thanks for visiting. 🙂
On topic of finding like minded people you’d share a coffee with if they lived nearby, it is a pleasure to meet you, through a random tweet of a friend for whom I beta read. Small world, even Texas and Australia.
I’ve had a similar Twitter experience to yours. The first year was a lot of trial and error. But once I realized it was a cocktail party, it finally clicked.
Funny story that. I was in my first group twitter discussion, totally confused about following threads and having a side discussion with one of the participants about how to tell which birdie the reply went to. It was the first @ listed, which made sense, and the whole format started making sense. I rather enjoy it now, even though I’m on it less than I was when I was trying to make it work.
Great points about auto follows too. They are like the obligatory thank you note, expected but not felt. But I do use DM’s. I shy away from no topic (yesterday is was abortion, last month rape) and sometimes a little privacy is needed.
AH, it’s amazing who you meet through Twitter. Nice to tweet you too! 🙂
I find my Twitter presence ebbs and flows, mostly due to busyness and other priorities taking over. But as an extrovert who works alone much of the time, it’s a fantastic opportunity to connect with other humans!
The problem with DMs is more about the auto-DMs. Some people have services set up where, whenever someone follows them, a bot sends out an auto-DM with a plug for the person’s website or book etc. Hackers also hijack people’s Twitter accounts and use DMs to send porn links. Most people with larger followings simply don’t read their DMs because they get so many and they’re all junk mail of one sort or another.
I do agree with you that DMs are useful for sensitive topics, and I also use them sometimes to ask a private question, or send my email address etc. But I usually give an @mention to let the person know I’m about to DM, as I know so many don’t read DMs. 🙂
I every time spent my half an hour to read this web site’s content everyday along with a mug of coffee.
Hi, just read this after it was RT’d. For the most part I turn off RT’s, except on my writing twitter friends. And yes, that’s who RT’d it. I’ve made some fabulous friends on twitter and I class them as friends. When I refer to them in conversation they’re friends, not online friends. I wanted to say yes, start off slowly. I joined after watching an interview with an actor in July last year. I’ve only just now started following over 100, I’ve somehow managed to end up with more followers. I’m confused with the protocols there still and am positive I’m not getting it right. But I hate being made to feel obligated to follow people that I don’t know. I didn’t join twitter to follow people I didn’t know. I joined for a specific purpose, the friendships I’ve built are an extremely happy byproduct and I’ll be forever greatful to that actor!
Hi Jacqui, yes friends are friends, no matter where you meet. When people follow you, it’s generally just their way of introducing themselves to you, or even giving you a bit of encouragement. But there is no obligation to follow back if you don’t want to — you are the captain of your own tweet stream.
Fantastic that you’ve found Twitter valuable and enjoyable!
Thanks for stopping by. 🙂
“I know some people recommend auto-Direct Messaging new followers, and auto-tweeting your follower/unfollower numbers, but they are some of the most complained-about behaviours on Twitter. Some people will even instantly unfollow you for doing this.”
I did this for the first time today. An Author Solutions employee followed me, so I politely followed back… only to receive a DM saying ‘ask me for advice on indie publishing’. Yeah, I’ll get on to that right after I ask Kentucky Fried Chicken for help in lowering cholesterol. Unfollow.
Hi Iola, I remember when I first joined Twitter, I would get DMs that asked me questions, such as: “What is your favourite time of day to write?” I would reply, and that would be the end of the conversation, because they obviously weren’t monitoring the responses. It was disappointing for this shining-eyed newbie, to say the least!
I now simply don’t read DMs, because I get so many, and they are all auto-tweets, or spam with links to rude pictures sent because someone’s account has been hacked. Best way to converse is in the open, with an @mention.
Thanks for stopping by! 🙂
So right. You’ll see more of me then. But I will be keeping up on your posts.
Belinda,
Great post. Lots of points everybody can gain from reviewing even if they have been on Twitter a while. I have made a few connections on Twitter, and I’m looking forward to summer break and the opportunity to make some Twitter friends.
Elldee
Hi Elldee, thanks for stopping by.
Another Twitter rule we could add is Be Sensible. We get pressured to do so many things that people say are essential, but sometimes it’s better just to find our own rhythm that works for us. Wishing you a wonderful summer of Twitter friendships! 🙂
Hi Belinda
what a great post! It can be so easy to take twitter too seriously and/or, as you say, wrongly and cause more harm than good. I prefer it to all other forms of social media but even though I have been using it for over a year now I still feel a novice, so I really appreciate this advice. I think this is a must read for all writers who want to use twitter (and a very helpful reminder for all us writers who do) and I’ll be pointing all my writing students in this direction. Thanks again …oh, and I laughed out loud when I saw my tweet – he he he 🙂 Having lovely twitter friends is what makes using twitter worthwhile 🙂
Hi Marianne, you are turning into a Twitter star! And your tweet that I quoted worked because it came across as just genuine and spontaneous.
I’ve been on Twitter two years myself now, and it took me a while to work out how I wanted to use it. Lots of trial and error. And my use of it will probably keep changing over time. I am now much more relaxed and less of a slave to it… 😉
But it’s my favourite social network too. The others I drop into from time to time Because I Probably Should, but Twitter is the place I go because it’s fun and friendly and useful all at the same time.
Hey Marianne, congrats on Food of Ghosts! (I’m saying it now b/c I didn’t see the tweet last week). 😛
Hi Belinda! What a great post. I think people underestimate the kinds of real connections they can make on Twitter. I LOVE some of the people I’ve met in the Twitterverse. I’ve now MET some of the people in real life. It’s not at all about tweeting. Who cares about tweeting? It’s about the people.
I always look for good content to RT and rarely RT ‘direct marketing’ tweets. I’d rather RT something that is funny or informative and then let others find their way to that person’s other work through the path that you outlined above — getting to know them!
I wish I had more time to spend on Twitter because I think it is such a great resource. Through weekly chats and hashtag searches and using lists and all the other fun tricks, you can uncover so much information. Even if someone wants to be a Twitter voyeur, it’s still got its benefits.
Oh Laura, I’ve met Twitter friends in real life too.
People talk about Twitter vs the Real World, as though it’s somehow less authentic. But people can be just as false in person as online, if they want to be. I find myself thinking: the people I have met on Twitter ARE real. I’m real too. You can’t get real-er than people, wherever you happen to meet. 😉
Enough philosophy! Back to work.
Hi Belinda. Happy Easter!!! I really appreciate this blog. I can take it with me and remember your tips as an excellent guide throughout my Twitter endeavor. I feel like you truly do care about your followers and treat them like real people. You also have the patience and kindness it takes to gather the attention of fellow readers and writers on social media. You have a friend and follower for life. 🙏
Thank you so much, Kadmiel. Happy Easter to you too! I do try to help people on Twitter as much as I can and I’m glad you’ve felt that it was happening. 🙂